Days 188-194
Clearly the best way to pick up wedding tips is to go to a wedding and watch other people get it wrong. It was therefore a bit unhelpful of the friends who got married this weekend to go and get everything so horribly, horribly right.
The first disappointment was when the groom failed to spontaneously combust when he set foot on sacred ground. I had good money on an unholy trinity of him doing that, promising to obey his wife during the vows and then falling down the church steps on the way out. He managed none of them and I'll be telling him what a failure he is when he gets back from his honeymoon.
There were things about the wedding that Goth Girl and I will do differently. We might skip the bottle throwing locals, for example, although with my family there anything could happen. But in terms of food, drink and dancing we now have something to live up to.
The first disappointment was when the groom failed to spontaneously combust when he set foot on sacred ground. I had good money on an unholy trinity of him doing that, promising to obey his wife during the vows and then falling down the church steps on the way out. He managed none of them and I'll be telling him what a failure he is when he gets back from his honeymoon.
There were things about the wedding that Goth Girl and I will do differently. We might skip the bottle throwing locals, for example, although with my family there anything could happen. But in terms of food, drink and dancing we now have something to live up to.
posted by The Skiver at 11:57 pm
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